Book Review: Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine and The Four Tendencies

Books are my jam. I would chose a book over TV or a movie any day of the year. Most of my life I’ve leaned pretty heavily into fiction because I love being swept away to different countries, time periods, and circumstances. But lately I’ve fallen hard for well-written, engaging non-fiction.

So this year I’ve decided to try to equal out my fiction and non-fiction reads. And I’ll try really hard to review one of each every week.

So without further ado, I give you . . .


The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin

I love a good personality quiz. Don’t you? I will take every single one, even if some seem a little “out there”. I know my Myers-Briggs type, my color, my animal (?), my love language, and even what style of clothes I should be wearing based on my personality. I thought I knew everything there was to know about me.

And then I read The Four Tendencies. You know that feeling you have when you read something about personalities and it feels like someone has been living inside your head for a week, feeling what you feel, saying what you say, doing what you do? Yeah. That.


Gretchen Rubin describes four different personality types based on how people respond to expectations, both outer and inner. I am an Upholder, meaning I can meet other people’s expectations for me, but also my own for myself. My husband is a Questioner, which means he can meet his own inner expectations, but has to question and find justification in outer expectations. After reading the descriptions of our tendencies, I couldn’t help but laugh at all the times he’s broken rules or just not done things because he can’t see a good reason for it, while I will blindly follow rules because it’s what’s expected of me.

The other two tendencies are Obliger and Rebel. An Obliger meets all outer expectations, but can’t meet their own without accountability of some sort. And a Rebel resists all expectations, both theirs and other’s.

Besides describing these different tendencies, Rubin also talks about ways to live and work with the other tendencies, and also ways to motivate yourself or find the accountability you need to reach goals or even complete routine, everyday tasks. I think this book is definitely worth a read and I look forward to applying some of the ideas to myself.

If you’d like to read it, you can order it from Amazon here.


Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman

How do I tell you all the things I loved about this book without telling you the whole story?!


Eleanor Oliphant is quiet, awkward, and damaged. She’s also hilarious.

This is a normal, everyday story of a woman finding herself, her place, and her truth. She’s moving and funny. She’s brave and scared. She’ll make you laugh and cry and she teaches us that we don’t have to be who we’ve always been.

Definitely put this on your list this year. You can find it here.


What are you reading this week? What makes you pick up a book?

I’ll see you back here next week for two more book reviews!

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