I Understand Now, Mom

Hi Mom,

I’ve been putting off writing your letter because I just don’t think I have the words.

What can I say to the person who brought me into the world and then never left my side? Thank you? That seems insufficient. It doesn’t explain the deep gratitude I feel for you for standing by me and helping me make hard choices. Or the unspeakable gratefulness I feel for your limitless support.

Mom, I didn’t realize what being a mother meant until I became one. I didn’t know the level of sacrifice it would take or the amount of love I was capable of. I didn’t understand how much courage it takes to raise a child or how my heart would break daily for these small humans.

I didn’t know the soul stirring joy I’d receive in a small hand reaching out to hold mine or the feeling of kissing those impossibly soft cheeks goodnight. I couldn’t possibly have understood the magnitude of a child saying, “I want to be just like you when I grow up”.

But I understand those things now, Mom. And I simply do not have the words. You sacrificed for me and loved me fiercely. You still do. You poured your heart out to God on behalf of your children. I know the deep depths of fear and the soaring heights of joy that motherhood brings.

i understand.

Thank you more than words can say. I love you so much.



  1. It takes a lot to render me speechless, but you have succeeded! As I reach for the kleenex, I want to thank you, Sarah, for your beautiful letter and sharing from your heart. God has blessed me tremendously through you and the rest of our amazing family. I stand in awe of how you have grown and matured as a person and as a child of God. You are gifted in so many ways – writing being one of those gifts. Continue to be yourself with all people, because if you don’t you are depriving them of something very special! I love you!


  2. Oh, I agree Sarah! Being a mother gives me much more gratitude for what my parents did for me. This is a beautiful letter, and I love the topic of your 31 days. Your words matter, and I’m glad that you’re sharing them this way!
    Glad to find you through today’s facebook thread.


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